Hey, for those who don’t know me I am Wika and I am 20 years old. I came from Poland (from Krakow) and I will spend the next few months working at the youth center and a primary school in Zagorje.

My Slovenian adventure began in January, but my thoughts have been in the country since November. When I think back to this period of waiting, it often impresses me how our body and brain doses us with stressful thoughts in certain situations and marks points on our way so that we can go slowly part by part, and not have to walk the whole way in one shot.

When I was looking for volunteering at first, I applied for volunteering jobs that would start soon afterward. I was sure that this way I wouldn’t have time to think too much about going and I wouldn’t get overthink. But in the end, I am grateful that I decided to give myself a little more time, because as it turned out, this waiting time was not so terrible after all, and it was not months full of stress against the visions that had previously formed in my head.

Of course, during the preparations I was accompanied by stress or uncertainty, but this was related to the particular stage of preparation and not to the travel. Because I had a few months to go, the travel was still a long way off in a way. I kept telling myself that I still had time and that I could slowly get used to the idea of leaving, step by step. Then, with one week to go, I had to start packing.

This turned out to be one of the hardest phases, not only because I hate packing, but also because in addition to the excitement of the last few months, there was the stress of not only packing but also leaving. It then came to me that seriously I was going to another country for more than half a year. Once I had finally packed (and believe me, it wasn’t that easy), I was relieved that I had made it, but since then, this strange uncertainty about what to do next has never left me.

When I got on the bus, I was frankly terrified. My emotions were at their highest possible level. However, when the bus set off, I felt a huge sense of relief and calmness spread over my body and mind. The decision had been made – I was going to Slovenia.

When I think about it now, I am glad that I allowed myself to feel all these emotions, and that I gave myself space to cry. I allowed myself to feel fear, but at the same time to be happy with this new stage in my life.

It’s extremely important to give ourselves permission to feel ALL the emotions. I think this makes it at least a little easier for us to take the next step. Even if it will be an extremely difficult step, feel free to make it at least that easy for yourself.

Wika

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Neprehojene poti

Hej, za tiste, ki me ne poznajo, se imenujem Wika in sem stara 20 let. Prišla sem s Poljske (iz Krakova) in bom naslednjih nekaj mesecev delala v mladinskem centru in osnovni šoli v Zagorju.

Moja slovenska pustolovščina se je začela januarja, vendar so moje misli v državi že od novembra. Ko razmišljam o tem obdobju čakanja, me pogosto navduši, kako nam telo in možgani v določenih situacijah odmerjajo stresne misli in označujejo točke na poti, da lahko počasi hodimo del za delom in nam ni treba prehoditi celotne poti v enem zamahu.

Ko sem sprva iskala prostovoljno delo, sem se prijavljala na prostovoljna dela, ki bi se začela kmalu zatem. Prepričan sem bil, da tako ne bom imel časa preveč razmišljati o odhodu in da se ne bom preveč zamislila. A na koncu sem hvaležna, da sem si odločila dati malo več časa, saj se je izkazalo, da ta čas čakanja vendarle ni bil tako grozen in da ni bil mesece poln stresa proti vizijam, ki so se mi prej izoblikovale v glavi.

Seveda me je med pripravami spremljal stres ali negotovost, vendar je bilo to povezano z določeno fazo priprav in ne s potovanjem. Ker sem imel pred seboj še nekaj mesecev, je bilo potovanje na neki način še vedno daleč.

Vedno znova sem si govorila, da imam še čas in da se lahko počasi, korak za korakom, navadim na misel, da bom odšla. Potem pa sem morala en teden pred odhodom začeti pakirati. To se je izkazalo za eno najtežjih faz, ne samo zato, ker ne maram pakiranja, ampak tudi zato, ker se je poleg vznemirjenja zadnjih nekaj mesecev pojavil še stres ne samo zaradi pakiranja, ampak tudi zaradi odhoda. Takrat mi je prišlo na misel, da se resno odpravljam v drugo državo za več kot pol leta. Ko sem končno spakirala (in verjemite mi, ni bilo tako lahko), sem si oddahnila, da mi je uspelo, vendar me od takrat ta čudna negotovost glede tega, kaj bom počela naprej, ni nikoli zapustila.

Ko sem vstopil na avtobus, sem bil naravnost prestrašen. Moja čustva so bila na najvišji možni ravni. Ko pa je avtobus odpeljal, sem začutil ogromno olajšanje in umirjenost, ki sta se razširila po mojem telesu in umu. Odločitev je bila sprejeta – šel sem v Slovenijo.

Ko zdaj razmišljam o tem, sem vesela, da sem si dovolila občutiti vsa ta čustva in da sem si dala prostor za jok. Dovolila sem si čutiti strah, a hkrati biti srečna s tem novim obdobjem v mojem življenju.

Izjemno pomembno je, da si dovolimo čutiti VSA čustva. Mislim, da nam je tako vsaj malo lažje narediti naslednji korak. Tudi če bo to izjemno težak korak, si ga lahko vsaj tako olajšate.

Wika

Projekti prostovoljstva v okviru Evropske solidarnostne enote mladim nudijo priložnosti za prostovoljsko delo. Odgovarjati morajo na pomembne potrebe družbe, prispevati h krepitvi skupnosti in ob tem prostovoljcem omogočati, da pridobivajo uporabne izkušnje, veščine in kompetence za svoj osebni, izobraževalni, socialni, državljanski in profesionalni razvoj, s čimer se izboljšuje njihova zaposljivost.

Več o programu Evropske solidarnostne enote (slo. ESE, ang. ESC, bivši EVS) si lahko preberete na povezavi: http://www.movit.si/ese/projekti-prostovoljstva/